Heather Keith Freeman (jnanacandra) wrote,
Heather Keith Freeman

  • Mood:

Brains and energy.


My recurring problem: remembering that my energy comes not from resting, but from doing the things that fulfill me. Even when I know this in my head, I seem to be fighting against a lifetime of conditioning that the only way to regain energy is to do as little as possible.

How do you break lifelong conditioning like that? I have years of experience countering it, my head knows it's wrong, my heart even knows it most of the time. And yet I find myself being surprised by it approximately twice a week.

I have a lifelong preference for rejecting the "standard" wisdom in favor of finding my own path. Frequently I discover that the standard wisdom is actually correct, or at least has a damned good reason for being the way it is. (Case in point, standardized bedtimes for toddlers. Aiden is *so* much easier to cope with now that he has an 8:00 bedtime....which is the standard wisdom, but I had to try other things first to truly see and understand why.)

How is this related to the source of my energy? Well, here is a place where I feel the standard wisdom (that energy comes from resting) is completely and utterly wrong, and yet I can't shake my own assumptions based on that "wisdom". It's maddening.

On the bright side, I made wings this evening.
Tags: brains

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