So last night Katy was bringing Rachel over, but I was really tired so went to bed before they got here. Sometime later I vaguely noticed the door open and some weight land on the bed at my feet, but I assumed it was Tom dumping a cat on the bed or something. At some point I sat up and noticed the blankets in a strange configuration that for some reason made me think there was a baby basket with craven inside. Looked closer, saw no cat (or baby basket, for that matter) and lay back down. Stretched out my legs and bumped into something heavy. Heavier than a cat. "What the heck?" rolled through my sleep-fogged brain, and I sat up again. Picked up the blankets and stared blearily at what I could only process as a large beach- or basketball. Then, like an optical illusion inverting, I realized it was someone's ass. Not shaped right to be Tom's. I look over, and there's Rachel! I attempt to apologize for inadvertently sodomizing her with my toes and fall back asleep.