May 23rd, 2001

firesea: self-portrait


So I may have first-year-medical-student syndrome here, but I just did some reading on ADD and it's scary how well some of it fits.

Have trouble completing projects and jump from one activity to another.

Were told by parents and teachers that you should have tried harder in school.
Not really, but I was smart enough to coast through. I've often castigated myself for not 'trying harder', I probably could have graduated with honors if I had.

Are frequently forgetful

have trouble remembering to do the things you intended.
all the time, even when I make lists

Frequently rushing,
used to be - overcompensated by not doing ANYTHING

often late.
again, overcompensate by setting watch early, adding half hour buffers to every plan

Make impulsive purchases, impulsive decisions.
learned overcompensatory mechanisms, again

Feel overwhelmed and disorganized in your daily life.

Have a disorderly purse, car, closet, household, etc.
I never HAVEN'T had these

Are easily distracted from the task you are doing.

Go off on tangents in conversations; may tend to interrupt.
been told I do it all the time, though I never notice it at the time

Have trouble balancing your checkbook; difficulty with paperwork.
not trouble/difficulty so much as lack of patience - if I cant do it in ten seconds I get so frustrated I explode

You're supposed to have had these symptoms all your life, even though it can start causing problems anytime - I've never been organized, or been very good at concentrating on things I find boring. I thought ADD was just lack of attention, but it turns out it's both extremes - you're either hyper-focused or not focused at all. The story of my life.

Official diagnosis is this huge mess, though - they have to go through your transcripts and grades and stories from your early years through your whole life. Bleah. Can I put up with that or will just knowing it may be there help? We'll see.
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