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yay weekend

Saturday I picked up jc at the airport, and he and Laurel and I went to see Final Fantasy. It was interesting - of course, since I was watching it in movie critic mode (like I do all movies since I started writing reviews) I can't just say that it was good and be done with it, but I'll just shut up about it here.

Then jc and I just, er, "hung out" in the hotel room for the rest of the day ;)

Sunday we went downtown - spent a while in the Smithsonian Natural History museum, and then took a walk allllll the way down to the Lincoln memorial. Very pretty, but very hot! (It's DC, duh). Took a side trip to the Vietnam memorial, too, which was an interesting empathic experience - lots of grief and sadness, obviously, but kind of muted under a frenetic hopelessness. Bizarre.

jc all gone home now. But only five days left for me - I should be able to last that long without going nutso again. La.

A pessimistic part of my mind is wondering if I've become dependent on Jarrett - I never thought I was, but spending this time away from him has been hell. I can't ground or shield reliably if I'm not with him; I really need to be able to do that on my own, but I haven't the first idea how to make it happen. I know all the exercises and strategies, but they only work when I'm around people who can ground me. There are exactly three people who can do that - one's Jarrett, one's in Seattle, and one is in Maine. The one in Maine can shield me long-distance (which I keep forgetting) but I haven't been able to ground through any of them unless I'm in the same general vicinity.


firesea: self-portrait
Heather Keith Freeman
Fire Sea Studios

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October 2012


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